Alone at Home
by Forgotten by Myself
Summary: Mello looks back at his first times for different things. Rated M for buttsecks, language, and such.


It was Mello. By himself, flipping aimlessly through the channels on TV. Matt's been gone for 2 days now. Mello was lonely, and for the past 2 nights, all he had in the night was his right hand. Mello always made himself smile, no matter if it was his cockiness, or how conceited he was. But he could never act as arrogant as he did when Matt was gone... He's still flipping through channels when he comes across a channel with free porn.

He laughed to himself a bit, the weird yet tasteless names of the movies. Mello just switched it to the music channel and sighed to himself.

He blamed Matt for everything, even though it could've been his own fault. But he loved being in control, and getting Matt all worked up. Because in the night, he knew they would kiss and cuddle, and it'd end up to them screwing eachother's brains out. Matt was really the one that made him happy, sometimes even more than himself. Mello would hear a car outside and think it was Matt, but it ended up being the neighbor. Millions of words and thoughts flew around in his mind, and he just lauged as all thoughts stopped. Mello just remembered 3 different people that he came across in his lifetime.

Derek.

Mello and Matt were 18 and just got their own apartment. They went back and forth to the house and the truck, unpacking their things. Matt didn't notice, but Mello did. He saw the older man, about 30 or 35, looking at him while he took long drags of his cigarette. His hair flipped around as he moved, and Mello smiled at how Derek's eyes wandered to his junk. Mello just thought of him bending him over on whatever, dirty, or clean furniture he had in his house and just fucking him. Hard, and at a fast pace. Matt carried the last box in the house, and Mello followed him in. He took a last look at the guy before walking in his house.

Mello knew he was gay. He also knew he liked Matt - a lot. They had two seperate bedrooms, but Mello just thought about Matt as if he'd be right next to him as he slept. He imagined himself walking into Matt's room and just kissing him, giving him a blow job, whatever ran through his mind. Each night he'd giggle while he jerked off, but it was kind of a self vs. self thing.

Matt was sitting on the couch and drinking a soda that he bought at the gas station. The air was hot, and the boxes pooled around every corner of the room, it seemed. "Matt?" Mello spoke up, scratching the back of his head.

"Hmm?" Matt responded, looking over at him.

"I'm gonna.. go to the store down the street." Mello lied, trying to sound as convincing as possible. So Matt nods his head, and Mello's out the door, quickly. He walks past the man next door, wanting his attention badly. Mello was pretty sure of what this man wanted, and he was willing to give it to him. The blond's hips move with his steps, and he hears the man talking. "How old are you?" The weird guy asks him as he walks past.

"Eighteen." Mello replied, without hesitation. Mello started walking up to the guy, and as he got closer, he came to realize that he was wearing a blue robe and some briefs. His skin was pale, and Mello was kind of scared of this guy.

"Come sit with me.." The man suggested, motioning for him to sit upon the dirty, plastic chair on his patio. Mello gave in, and sat open legged on the chair as he scanned his form seductively.

"I can give you what you want, gay boy." Derek taunted, but also in an offering gesture. Gay.. The word 'gay' always used to ring in Mello's ears. _Gay, faggot, cocksucker, nancy boy._ Those words are words he'd always think about, and care about. But he couldn't care much longer, because he _knew_ he was gay. He likes cocks, he takes it up the ass, he sucks cocks, whatever.

Before Mello knew it, this guy he didn't even know was pounding in and out of his ass. Mello kept back his cries, this hurt him really bad. The guy was working him over hard, and strangely, Mello enjoyed it. Mello grabbed onto the fabic on the couch as this guy's movement got faster. He was hard. Very hard. This was his first time getting fucked, and this is just the first time he ever felt so hurt. The smell of smoke lingered in the air, pot did, aswell. The room was filled with tension, and as Mello's form rubbed against this guy's dirty couch, he got sweaty. He grabbed onto Mello's hips and pounded into him quicker than ever, and making heavy breaths.

"Say my name..."

"Derek!"

Derek.

Matt was playing a video game, as usual, and Mello was in his room, on his laptop. Mello scanned through a long message someone gave him on an IM session. He didn't really know him, but he figured he may as well just go visit him, as he addressed in the IM.

It was the next day, and Mello gave his hair one final brush before setting the item down and walking past Matt. He apparently fell asleep on the couch overnight, must've been a game marathon... Mello quietly moved his way out the door, and started walking to Danny's house.

Danny was a friend he met on this website. Mello laughed at how loserish it was of him that they'd fuck virtually. Sometimes they'd even pretend like they both had vaginas. The nights always ended with snickers and possible ejaculation, but nothing sentimental. So because of this, Mello was kind of unsure.

The numbers '80' on the door were visible until they swooped off. Danny opened the door to a leather clad blond.

Danny.

Mello smiled cheesily as Danny reached his arms around him for a hug. His voice was a bit girlish.

"I'm so glad you're here, Mello." He greeted in a sexy tone of voice, grabbing Mello's ass into the hug.

Mello then felt something poke him. He laughed inside.

"So what do we do?" Mello asked, sitting down on the clean couch.

"We fuck." Danny replied, sitting next to Mello and eyeing his junk, just like Derek did.

"That's it? Just fuck?" Mello asked, with a more serious face. But instead of words, Danny pulled Mello's legs over his own. Mello was now catching on and sat up on Danny's lap, diving into a kiss out of curiosity.

Between Mello's tongue in his mouth, Danny would ask about Matt. If Mello ever fucked him, if Matt ever fucked him. But all mello would do is groan, as their hips bucked up against eachother's. They both moaned into the kiss, their dicks just hitting eachother's at each movement. Mello would remember this, the day he was actually slower on a guy.

Danny pushed Mello off him, and unzipped his own pants to reveal a rather large length. Mello smirked, and did what anyone else would do at this point. He wrapped his mouth around his dick, of course. Mello realized it - he was going down on a guy. He smirked to himself as he did everything to Danny, making him tilt his head back as he let out an animalistic grunt. Mello didn't want to taste this guy's jizz, so he took his mouth off of him as he realized he was almost over the edge, and began stroking him with slow motions.

"You like that?" Mello asked him seductively, winking in the process.

"Fuck- faster!" He commanded, scrambling his hands around whatever he touched beside him. Mello's movements got faster, until his hand started to ache a bit. A transparent, white fluid emitted from Danny. Mello smirked at his success, and sat back on his lap, pants still off. Mello kissed him all over, he even began licking his chest when he'd lift up his shirt. Danny, who was breathing heavily, kissed back.

"Fuck me..." Danny breathed, his head falling back.

"Already did." Mello shot back, kissing his neck one last time.

Danny.

The third person was barely a third person. He was more like a bagillionth person. It was Matt. Just Matt. Before Mello started going out with Matt, he encountered different guys. He remembers their first time, but it was like nothing before.

Matt looked over at Mello, who was rummaging through the stuff in his glove compartment. They were in Matt's car, obviously, and Matt just leaned in and kissed him hard on the lips. Mello always gave kisses that were like your mouth getting a blowjob. But that's not the whole reason why matt loved kissing him. "I want chocolate.." Mello requested, while he broke away from the intense kiss. Matt opened his door, and Mello did too. They both grabbed hands and walked into the gas station. It went from the dark outside, to the bright lighted inside.

Mello dragged Matt to an aisle that he wasn't familiar with Mello going to, but what he didn't realize that this pace was in front of the bathroom door. Mello let go of his hand, and forced Matt inside the small bathroom, shutting and locking the door behind them. Matt's heart raced in excitement, so did Mello's. Unlike Matt, Mello knew what he had to do. Mello kissed him, with so much tongue. The taste of chocolate escaped Mello's mouth. The kiss was hot, it was intense. Matt got hard, Mello got hard. They both took of their shirts, they were so anxious that the time it took to get their shirts off was annoying. Mello's bare stomach brushed up against his, until they were fully pressed against eachother's.

"I love you." Matt stopped, his shoulders wrapped around Mello's. His green eyes made contact with Mello's blue ones. Mello smiled, his breathing got less heavy.

"I love you too." Mello did. Mello really loved him, and Matt loved him just as much. Matt smiled and leaned into Mello's chest, pulling him down to the dirty tile floor. No matter how dirty and germy this place was, it was romantic. -Strangely. Matt slowly traced kisses along Mello's collarbone, and down to his stomach. Mello was all the way on the ground now, as Matt kissed his stomach with so much passion. It was hard to hold back a moan. Matt then stopped, he looked up at Mello as he was on his knees. Mello looked back at him and nodded of approval.

Matt started to untangle the bundle of string that kept Mello's pants around his waist. Matt thought of his figure, it was sexy, and skinny. Matt was afraid of making a move on Mello for some reason, but on some days they'd just talk about sex. Matt looked at Mello's dick with hunger. Like he was going to feast upon it or something. Matt just hesitantly sucked on him, his movements were slow, and kind of scared and weirded out. Mello moaned loudly, and held his eyes shut tight. His smooth hands finding the top of Matt's head, and pushing down on it slightly.

"Oh god, Matt..." Mello moaned, Matt looks up at him with innocent eyes. His head and mouth go up and down each time, his pace getting faster and faster. Before Mello tipped over the line, he gently pushed Matt's head off of him. Matt then looked at Mello as if to ask if he did something wrong. But Mello just gets on his own knees, pushes Matt on the ground, and pulls his pants off. Mello pushed his smooth finger on the top of Matt's cock, while he let out a moan. It was kind of a surprised moan, though. He then just gripped around Matt and stroked him, slowly and slowly. Then it got faster, as he knew that Matt wanted it.

"Oh fuck-" Matt was cut off by his own reaction to all of this, a thick substance coming out of him. Mello was surprised that he didn't last very long, but this _was_ his first time being jacked off. Mello lay next to him, his stomach moving up and down with each breath. Mello fingered each visible rib and ab on Matt's stomach, giving him goosebumps all over.

Matt.

Mello remembered everything about Matt, and he also remembered every moment they shared. The silly fights, the ones where Matt would yell and Mello would stare at him blankly. Matt couldn't stand being mean to someone as adorable as Mello, so he'd end up embracing him and apologizing. He'd remember the times he'd come home drunk or stoned or whatever, and Matt would make him something nice to eat and send him to bed. Although Matt was a good fuck, and Mello would always act like he was the hardest and most cruel person. But in reality, Mello loved riling up Matt, or just Matt doing anything for him.

All of these thoughts coursed through Mello's head, until he heard a car outside. It was that same, red car that should always be here. In the distance, Mello sees stripes and smiles.


End file.
